6 Month Anniversary

Tomorrow is Robert and my 6 month anniversary. On one hand, it seems like we've been together much longer (in a good way) and then on the other hand it seems like the 6 month mark has come so quickly! When we became official and had been together a few months I put our 6 month mark in my planner not entirely sure if we'd make it until then. Not like I had any feelings of foreboding or whatnot, but because you never know what's going to happen. Now we're here, and it's flown by. I love spending time with Robert no matter what we're doing. He's totally "the one". :)

We both have to work tomorrow, and then in the evening he got us reservations at Portobello (website here and twitter here) , which neither of us have been to. I've heard good things about it. When I looked online for a menu, this was listed:

The menu changes almost every night, due to seasonal availability and what comes our way. 

Very Portland/hipster/eco-friendly. I love it. haha. I'm looking forward to seeing how it is and getting dressed up to go out together. Next we'll be celebrating a year together! Time sure does fly, especially when you're having fun (as the old saying goes).

100 Things I Love

My sister blogged this same idea the other day [at A Blonde Thinks...] and I thought that it would be a great way to remind myself of how good my life is and how I'm surrounded by beautiful things. Below are my 100!

 

Sunshine
Swimming
Star Wars
Movies
Cuddling
Hot cocoa
Christmas lights
Playing in the snow
Pizza
Pine trees
Robert
My family
My friends
'Parks & Rec'
Chocolate
Thai food
Pineapple fried rice
Sweet texts
Old bookstores
Books
The coast
Hot sand
Massages
Witty banter
Harry Potter
Being tall
Kisses
Holding hands
Animals
Rucifee
Disney films
'Sex and the City'
Old maps
Scrabble
Board games
Sweet drinks
Dilbert
Psychology
Summer
Christmas
Christmas cards
Valentines
Birthdays
Traveling
Flying
Trying new foods
Journaling
Receiving a letter
Presents
Hugs
Coffee
Avas Rosteria
Powells Bookstore
Amazon
Weddings
Drives through pine forests
Clean air
City lights at night
Facebook
Internet
NPR
Precious (Robert's cat)
No-bake cookies
RISK board game
Mom's home-made pizza
Movie marathons
Salty food
Music
Gone With The Wind (novel)
Very Mary-Kate
Peanut butter
Burnt popcorn
Theaters
Fashion
Egyptology
Memoirs
Biographies
Dystopian literature
Curry
Home cooked food
Pumpkin bread
Halloween
Costumes
Dressing up
Photos 
Blonde hair

Learning something new

Scrapbooking

Sleeping in

A comfortable bed 

Starbucks

Birch trees

'Friends'

'Will & Grace' 

'Easy A' 

Ice cream

Pools

Portland

Chai Tea

 

...and for the final (but not necessarily the best) one:

 

Oregon

 

 

 

Worst week of dating + Vegan woes

This week has probably been the worst week of dating that I’ve had in quite some time. Perhaps the worst week I’ve ever had dating wise.  The irony in that is that I’ve only actually been on one date and that all of my bad experiences this week have had to do with veganism.

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Guy #1: 

So first of all a guy named Josh writes me on Grindr. He's from the coast and honestly stunning. We talked about movies, books, morals, downtime activities, the beach, you name it. It was totally simpatico. We became Facebook friends so we could see more of each other's photos. As we're texting after becoming friends on there, he asks "So are you like some kind of greenie?" I hadn't ever heard that term before, so I said "What does that mean?" He said "You know, like someone that cares about the environment and recycles and stuff." I said "Well, yeah, I care about the environment and recycle." He was like "Oh." I thought I knew what he was getting at, so I said "Well, I'm not one of those people with dreads who live downtown and don't shave. I don't have gauges or wear burlap. But I am vegan." He didn't respond for quite a while and said "That's just weird." Previously he had told me that he hunted and fished and that was a big part of his life. 

Even though I'm vegan and don't support or condone hunting/fishing, it's not really any worse than buying meat at the store. In fact, it's probably more sustainable and better for the environment. I just could never kill another living being. If other people do that, that's their business. I didn't say anything about what I thought about hunting or fishing to him. I didn't even bring up my thoughts on animal treatment whatsoever.

I texted him back, but he didn't return my texts again. He was all gung-ho about meeting until he found out about my plant-eating ways.

Guy #2:

This guy was the one that I wrote about the other day where he killed his roommate's fish by dumping bleach in their tank. He's probably shoveling transients into a shallow grave as I type this. For a refresher of that date, you can see the post here.

Guy #3:

We met online and talked through the week for an hour or two each night. He seemed like a fun gun, though he definitely had some quirks. I had mentioned that I was vegan at some point or another and he was always like "that's weird." It didn't phase me at all because I honestly don't really care if people think it's weird or not. On the last night of us talking, he asked "So why are you vegan?" I told him that there are three prongs to my reasoning: First, my health. Second, environmental sustainability. Third, compassion for animals. I gave a brief overview of each one and why it meant something to me, and for some reason that sparked him. He got super angry and completely went off, yelling about how I was "wrong", "delusional" and "had no idea what [I was] talking about." I told him that he was the one that had asked me, and the only thing I had done was explain my reasoning and not talk about anyone else's choices. I also said that I didn't need to justify my choices or validate my life through him and I am perfectly fine with my reasoning. He then hung up on me, which is an automatic deal breaker in my book (though him flying off the handle was as well). He did end up texting to apologize a few days later, but I have no interest in someone like that.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

Needless to say, this week was pretty disconcerting dating wise. I called my best friend and chatted with her about it and she helped to ground me. I realized in talking through it that I had not done anything wrong. I do believe in my reasons for staying vegan and I am the least judgmental person when it comes to what other people eat. How can I judge? I ate meat for my entire life up until 1.5 years ago and most people haven't put in the time and effort into researching veganism that I have. I haven't walked in someone else's shoes, so I really can't say if their decision are "right" or "wrong". That's all subjective anyway. What's right to me isn't necessarily right to someone else.

I don't preach, I don't make comments on other people's food, and I don't shove my ideas down other people's throats. I post stuff on facebook, but that's a forum for people to look at things if they're interested in it. If they aren't it's just like anything else on the internet: just don't click on it.

I think it's really unfortunate that people are so closed minded when it comes to me eating differently than them, and I also think it's very ironic. The general assumption is that vegans are super judgmental about everyone else, but the only thing I've found is that other people are judging me. Ironic much. I guess it's good that the judgmental ones are getting weeded out, because what I eat shouldn't really be a deal breaker in my opinion. I wouldn't want to date someone that expected me to conform to their beliefs just because.

I'm reminded of an article from TODAY.COM that found 30% of meat eaters won't date a vegetarian. Yes, I know this comes from an entertainment site and it's not a peer reviewed article. They also only asked people on one dating website, even though their pool of respondents was 4000. So this isn't something set in stone. But that floored me. 30% is really high! And that's just for vegetarians; I'm vegan! Interestingly enough, only 4% of vegetarians said they wouldn't date meat eaters. Anyone see who's really doing the judging here? Ever since I've read this I've been discouraged. Why, might you ask?

At the very best estimate, 10% of the American population identifies as homosexual.
For homosexual males (to which I am attracted), that would mean 5% of the population. That's already a pretty low number of viable candidates
Here's where the math takes on a "guesstimate" format, but here goes:
Of those 5% of gay males, maybe half are dating someone. That's 2.5% who are available. Then only 70% of those people are going to be ok with just vegetarianism? What about veganism?
What about the other caveats of people I could date: Men under 30? With a stable job? With a car? That don't do drugs? That brings the dating pool down to like .00005% of the population. And that's not even talking about whether our personalities mesh or what our interests are. When women say "all the good ones are gay" I find it incredibly naive and somewhat offensive.

Anyway, the moral of the story? I shouldn't have to give up my beliefs to be with someone, and I'm not going to. I am doing what's right for me and eventually I'd like to be with someone that respects that.

Here's hoping I don't end up a crazy cat lady.

To the boy I went on a date with last night...

To the boy I went on a date with last night:

Let me remind you how the scene went. I ordered the vegan boca burger. You asked "Why don't you get a regular burger?" I said "Oh, I just don't animal products." For some reason, that reminded you of a story of your old roommate where you poured a cup of bleach into her fish tank because you were annoyed the water wasn't clear enough. I asked "....Um, 

didn't that kill all the fish?" As you cackled loudly you chortled "Of course!" and then stared at me for awhile because I wasn't joining in the laughter.

Regardless of me eating animal products or not, I would never find this story funny. In fact, I'm worried you are a sociopath and your old roommate is probably in the trunk of your car. Needless to say, that dinner got wrapped up fast.

Freak.

Utah day 1

So I am in Utah staying at my aunts house with my sister Erika. My Mom, sister and I traveled down yesterday and got here late at night. Today was our first "real" day here and it was fun. I dropped Erika off at the BYU campus so she could visit her friend Casey and then I went to a Thai lunch with some MoHo friends.

We went to My Thai Asian Cuisine in Salt Lake and it was really good. For $10 I got a heaping plate of food that served as both my lunch and dinner. There were 9 of us MoHos there and it was a good group. For those with blogs, we had Scott, Warren, "Hope", "DarkDrearyWilderness" and "AKLDS". Afterward we headed to the Gateway mall and did some shopping and got Starbucks. Of course I got my tall Java Chip Frappuccino light, which means it only had 140 calories.

Between the Thai food and the shopping it was good meeting and catching up with a lot of MoHos. Funnily enough, I had only met Scott before and everyone else I was meeting for the first time in person. I had talked with most everyone online though at some point in time, so it was just like seeing friends again but just in a different dynamic.

After the mall I headed back to the BYU campus to pick Erika up which took an hour and we turned around to head right back to Aunt Lindas house. We settled our things and then took a 2.8 mile walk around the neighborhood. I found a neat way to map the amount of distance you are walking by putting it into gmap-pedometer.com. I saved that onto my favorites so I can easily tell what I am walking while outside. I want to walk more tonight, but it's pitch black out and I don't like walking in the dark. Tomorrow I am going to do that loop three times, so I will have walked almost 9 miles. Whoot.

Now it's bedtime. I had a party that I was invited to tonight but I am tired so Erika and I are unwinding at the house. Tomorrow I have walking in the morning, church at a German ward with my family at 1PM and then hanging out with my friend Taylor, which I am looking forward to. Should be a good day!

Thai Time

I went and got Thai from a food cart with my friend Peter today. It was really good and only $6.50. And of course all Thai food is good with tofu instead of meat so I got that instead of chicken. Mmm. Its in NE so I'd be very surprised if I was there again but I love trying new places.

Now off to pack for NYC!

Vegetarianism

So I am giving up meat for the summer. (Feel free to insert gay pun here). I've been looking at the health benefits of doing it and its very interesting to see that there is a marked difference in health between those who eat meat and those who do not. I'm starting tomorrow, actually, and have a few buddies that are going to keep me on track. I gave Whitney my chicken nuggets (which she was all gung ho about) and am not buying any more meat for the apt. I am going to continue eating some fish and eggs though. Thats mainly just in the form of tuna sandwiches, since I get a lot of protein from those. I know that eating just fish and eggs is called pescetarianism, so that's technically what I will be doing. I am also switching over my milk to a plant product rather than animal milk. There are some good options out there for that so I won't miss regular skim milk.

I'm excited to start this. I think it's going to help me be more conscious about what I am taking into my body and eat healthier in general. Plus I am trying to make more food at home recently so this will help with that.

Speaking of making more food at home, I am going to go buy a wok later today so that I can have round deux of making Thai pineapple fried rice. It was very vapid, but I believe that is because of how I prepared it. The last time I prepared everything separately since I didnt have a big enough pan and then added it into a bowl but thats not what the instructions call for.

I think this will be a good endeavor to get me thinking more about how healthy my food is for me and give me something new to try at home. Im hoping it goes well!

I am also starting:

- No alcohol [except on my vacations to NYC and Las Vegas]

- No eating out on my own or getting to-go food on my own

- No eating after 8pm

- No desserts

- No coffee or frappuccinos

- No soda [including diet]

- Trying to eat every 2-3 hours

Today I got to come down and spend the evening with mi madre in Salem. My Dad arrived in Utah today so it was just my Mom and I hanging out. We watched Harry Potter 4, played Racco and then made no-bake cookies. Of course we talked the entire time and it was really nice to see her. I am going to be really sad when I cant come down and see her anymore after she moves. We are going to go to Thai (surprise, surprise) tomorrow for lunch. You can never go wrong with a good Thai meal!

So I went to dinner last night to Berbati's with some friends and then we went out afterward. The dinner and going out was a lot of fun but there were two things that I wasn't super excited about that happened:

A. The guy that I am crushing on (we shall call him "B") told me that he usually goes for more masculine guys.

We met last week and then had a date at Fat Straw on 23rd a few days later. We also have a date for Tuesday where I am treating him to fondue at the Rheinlander (happy hour) since it's his birthday. I ran into him last night and we got to texting and he said that he was unsure about what he was thinking because he is usually attracted to guys that are more masculine. That makes sense because everyone has their preferences. I do, of course. I just think it's too bad because he is cute and fun and has his life together. I don't feel bad that I am effeminate at all because that's just who I am. I guess we shall see how the fondue date goes with B, though it doesn't seem like it will go anywhere.

B. I wore a trench coat last night that I had to take off when we went out dancing. I didn't really want to but it was too hot in there and it would have looked weird if I would have kept it on. I felt like a stuffed sausage. When I asked my friend "Does this make me look fat?" he responded "Well... Everyone has different body types and its different for everyone what fat means."

Ugh.

And the dieting begins. Again. I have fallen off the wagon on that lately with how busy i've been but now I am going to go hardcore. I think it is fascinating how some people have never worried about weight. Like they don't think about it. That is so foreign to me. I have always thought about it. Food, weight, the scale, numbers, calories. It's always been something that I think about since early high school. Kurt (my bro) said it isn't something that he ever thinks about. He just eats when he is hungry and has food that tastes good. I know that jealousy and envy are poisonous but I cant help feeling green about that. It's so... odd. I wonder if I will have that one day? My Mom told me one time that people eat when they are hungry and then pretty much forget about it from that point forward. They don't keep food logs or run over the food in their heads from the day. I think thats very cool. I just can't seem to do that.

Chat with my therapist

I went down to Salem yesterday to go to my Dr. appt. It was actually with my therapist so we could do a reeval since I havent seen her in over a year. I was happy because it was definitely an ego boost. She said that I was "serene and secure" and had done so much growing since I had seen her last. She said that I seemed comfortable in my own skin and that I had really found who I was. We chatted for an hour and I felt fine the entire time, even though we were talking about "deep" stuff. The last time I was there I was a mess, and she and I laughed about how I was so out of control then. It's good to get the positive reinforcement that I am doing so much better now. I feel good!

Afterward I went to Thai with my Mom and we had a really good meal at Thai Beer, then headed to Craft Warehouse for a bit of browsing on her lunch from work. It's always good to see her.

All in all, the 3 hours I spent there were bien. Lol

So I am loving being back in school. I feel like I am accomplishing something and bettering myself rather than just existing and breaking even. My classes are interesting ones to me since I am taking all psychology ones and two of my classes even use the same book. Plus my friend Carolyn had the book and so she's letting me borrow it this term. Score, huh? That's already 2/3 of my books taken care of without spending a penny. Obviously I'll treat her out to Thai as a thank you.

I love being around all the people my age who are wearing cool clothes, doing sports and studying lots of different things. You have the jocks in their sweats with lacrosse sticks, women in burqas, people chatting in foreign languages and everyone with eclectic Portland fashions. I am meeting people in my classes and say "hi" to the friends that I see on campus. There are 27,000 students that go there though so you can imagine I don't see a ton [PSU stats here]. ;)

My goal is to get a 4.0 this term. I held a 4.0 through my Associates so it's definitely something that I can do. Wish me luck!